Tweet
SCOTLANDIZATION OF THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL
James Hakobyan
Lragir.am
21 Aug 06
I am extremely proud of the national football team of Armenia.
Although our team is always failing to score more or less significant
draws, the national team nevertheless succeeds in preserving its
identity from "encroachments" of every foreign coach.
Changing the Armenian national team has become a "matter of honor"
for foreign coaches, which they have been unable to settle so far. And
they were four: Lopez from Argentina, Stoikica from Romania, Casoni
from France and Visman from Holland. The fifth was thought to be
either German or African. You may ask why. Because the question of
getting on with the leadership of the Armenian football would solve
easier in case the coach were German, and an African might manage
to do what the European and Latin American coaches failed. However,
the president of the Armenian Football Federation Ruben Hairapetyan
decided to swim in the same river for the fourth time and invited a
coach of the Armenian national team from Europe.
This time, however, Ruben Hairapetyan made a slight change. The fifth
foreigner and the fourth European is not from the continent this time,
he is from the isles, Great Britain. The new coach of the Armenian
national team is Scottish.
The choice was not made at random. After all, the biographies of
Armenians and Scotsmen have much in common. Both peoples fought for
their national identity, freedom and statehood for centuries. In this
context, the Armenians are more successful but apparently statehood is
nothing if there is no talent and ability to handle it. Therefore,
the national team of independent Armenia will be trained by a
representative of half-independent Scotland. Therefore, I do not
have objections. I dot suffer from national vanity, national fever,
I have never been infected with xenophobia. I simply state where our
coach comes from, realizing that it is more important who he is than
where he is from. In other words, what kind of coach the new coach,
the Scotsman, is, who is going to lead our national team from which
the Armenian football fans who have come of a conscious age do not
have expectations.
The new coach is not well known in the football sets. He trained two
African teams, naturally he was not successful. He also trained several
clubs, including the Scottish Aberdin and the English Chelsea. Although
success is a highly relative thing, and even a single goal can be
considered such. In this sense, however, the Armenian national team
might as well achieve success without a coach.
Consequently, it is supposed that the "delegate" of Scotland will
succeed doing what the coaches of countries which are closer to
Armenia in terms of the football school failed to do. In this sense,
it is difficult to imagine what the cold-blooded Scotsman is going to
teach the hot-blooded Armenians. It is simply useless to talk about
the difference of styles of play because presently football styles
have been somehow "leveled", and physical form is important of all,
although it would be wrong to assert that the styles have fully got
mixed. Consequently, either the coach has to change himself or he
must change the Armenian footballers, otherwise it will appear that
either the coach was not faithful to himself or the footballers were
not faithful to themselves. I remembered the joke about the Armenian
boy, who learned English from a black man, whose father decides to
check several months later if his son learned to speak English. The
father rings the bell of the door, the teacher opens the door and
calls the boy in Armenian, come on, your father is here.
It is highly probable that the 11 Armenian footballers will teach
Armenian football to the Scottish coach earlier than he will teach
his style to the Armenian footballers. It is possible, of course,
that the coach prefers Armenian football. In this case, however,
the question occurs why he agrees to train the Armenian national team.
After all, the presence of a coach is not obligatory in Armenian
football. And if he is needed, only for blaming him for defeats
and changing him. In this case, the Scottish coach should show up
in Armenia in the middle of the next summer when it will be clear
that the Armenian national team will take the last place in the
qualification games. The Scottish coach may visit Armenia on one of
those days to explain why it happened so and resign. Of course, we
are convinced that he will not manage to resign because the president
of the Armenian Football Federation will enter the hall and announce
loudly that he changes the coach of the national team.
After all, five is not much different from six. The coach cannot
be allowed to take his time to achieve success. As soon as there is
success, they demand promotion. Where can we get so much money?
Especially when the parliamentary election is coming up, and the
president of the football federation is not only a public figure but
also a member of the council of the ruling political party. Whereas
this also confuses foreign coaches of the national team, who come
and demand a salary. They do not realize that they are not alone, and
there are a number of people standing in a queue before him. If they
had money, they would not invite one coach for the national team,
the two Pyuniks, adults and juvenile, the juvenile and children's
national teams. And the coaches work. Then they see that soon they
will be made to wash the clothes of footballers. And at that moment
someone "advises" that Ruben Hairapetyan's financial abilities are
more than he pays to the coaches. After all, besides the Council of
the Republican Party there are others who give advice.
The coaches listen to this advice and demand money. Afterwards they
are given the sack, the air ticket and good memories of Armenia:
and you say coach, we might as well lose without a coach.
James Hakobyan
Lragir.am
21 Aug 06
I am extremely proud of the national football team of Armenia.
Although our team is always failing to score more or less significant
draws, the national team nevertheless succeeds in preserving its
identity from "encroachments" of every foreign coach.
Changing the Armenian national team has become a "matter of honor"
for foreign coaches, which they have been unable to settle so far. And
they were four: Lopez from Argentina, Stoikica from Romania, Casoni
from France and Visman from Holland. The fifth was thought to be
either German or African. You may ask why. Because the question of
getting on with the leadership of the Armenian football would solve
easier in case the coach were German, and an African might manage
to do what the European and Latin American coaches failed. However,
the president of the Armenian Football Federation Ruben Hairapetyan
decided to swim in the same river for the fourth time and invited a
coach of the Armenian national team from Europe.
This time, however, Ruben Hairapetyan made a slight change. The fifth
foreigner and the fourth European is not from the continent this time,
he is from the isles, Great Britain. The new coach of the Armenian
national team is Scottish.
The choice was not made at random. After all, the biographies of
Armenians and Scotsmen have much in common. Both peoples fought for
their national identity, freedom and statehood for centuries. In this
context, the Armenians are more successful but apparently statehood is
nothing if there is no talent and ability to handle it. Therefore,
the national team of independent Armenia will be trained by a
representative of half-independent Scotland. Therefore, I do not
have objections. I dot suffer from national vanity, national fever,
I have never been infected with xenophobia. I simply state where our
coach comes from, realizing that it is more important who he is than
where he is from. In other words, what kind of coach the new coach,
the Scotsman, is, who is going to lead our national team from which
the Armenian football fans who have come of a conscious age do not
have expectations.
The new coach is not well known in the football sets. He trained two
African teams, naturally he was not successful. He also trained several
clubs, including the Scottish Aberdin and the English Chelsea. Although
success is a highly relative thing, and even a single goal can be
considered such. In this sense, however, the Armenian national team
might as well achieve success without a coach.
Consequently, it is supposed that the "delegate" of Scotland will
succeed doing what the coaches of countries which are closer to
Armenia in terms of the football school failed to do. In this sense,
it is difficult to imagine what the cold-blooded Scotsman is going to
teach the hot-blooded Armenians. It is simply useless to talk about
the difference of styles of play because presently football styles
have been somehow "leveled", and physical form is important of all,
although it would be wrong to assert that the styles have fully got
mixed. Consequently, either the coach has to change himself or he
must change the Armenian footballers, otherwise it will appear that
either the coach was not faithful to himself or the footballers were
not faithful to themselves. I remembered the joke about the Armenian
boy, who learned English from a black man, whose father decides to
check several months later if his son learned to speak English. The
father rings the bell of the door, the teacher opens the door and
calls the boy in Armenian, come on, your father is here.
It is highly probable that the 11 Armenian footballers will teach
Armenian football to the Scottish coach earlier than he will teach
his style to the Armenian footballers. It is possible, of course,
that the coach prefers Armenian football. In this case, however,
the question occurs why he agrees to train the Armenian national team.
After all, the presence of a coach is not obligatory in Armenian
football. And if he is needed, only for blaming him for defeats
and changing him. In this case, the Scottish coach should show up
in Armenia in the middle of the next summer when it will be clear
that the Armenian national team will take the last place in the
qualification games. The Scottish coach may visit Armenia on one of
those days to explain why it happened so and resign. Of course, we
are convinced that he will not manage to resign because the president
of the Armenian Football Federation will enter the hall and announce
loudly that he changes the coach of the national team.
After all, five is not much different from six. The coach cannot
be allowed to take his time to achieve success. As soon as there is
success, they demand promotion. Where can we get so much money?
Especially when the parliamentary election is coming up, and the
president of the football federation is not only a public figure but
also a member of the council of the ruling political party. Whereas
this also confuses foreign coaches of the national team, who come
and demand a salary. They do not realize that they are not alone, and
there are a number of people standing in a queue before him. If they
had money, they would not invite one coach for the national team,
the two Pyuniks, adults and juvenile, the juvenile and children's
national teams. And the coaches work. Then they see that soon they
will be made to wash the clothes of footballers. And at that moment
someone "advises" that Ruben Hairapetyan's financial abilities are
more than he pays to the coaches. After all, besides the Council of
the Republican Party there are others who give advice.
The coaches listen to this advice and demand money. Afterwards they
are given the sack, the air ticket and good memories of Armenia:
and you say coach, we might as well lose without a coach.