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SARCASTIC REACTION TO TURKEY WOOING 'SOFT' ARMENIANS
By Jirair Tutunjian
http://www.armenianlife.com/2012/04/13/sarcastic-reaction-to-turkey-wooing-soft-armenians/
April 13, 2012
As of this morning, I will wait with bated breath for the postman
to deliver the buff envelope with the crescent-and-star insignia
of the Turkish Embassy on the top left corner. In it I expect to
find an invitation for a two-week familiarization trip to Turkey,
featuring a whirlwind visit to Turkish government archives which
would prove there was no genocide, followed by a visit to the Great
Mustapha's mausoleum to place a wreath. I will then traipse through
3,000-year-old fortresses, places of worship and monuments erected
by the Trojans/Lydians/Hittites (all ancestors of the Turks). We
will then make a circle tour of Gozan (Sis), Sanliurfa(Yetesia),
Gaziantep (Aintab) and other towns in Cukurova (Cilicia). We will
then visit Myra, the birthplace of St. Nicholas, the Turkish bishop
who was the original Santa Claus. To wrap up the trip, I expect to
be regaled with shish kebab, raki, chifteh telli and belly dancing
at a cafe overlooking the Bosporus.
I will return from the junket with several kilograms of Turkish
bumph about "Turkey: bridge between East and West", "Turkey: Model
Muslim Democracy", "Turks: the Origin of the Human Race", "Armenian
Terrorists Allies of El-Qaida", "1,000 Turks Who Changed the World." I
would expect that the man from Turkish foreign ministry insist that he
pay the airline for the extra weight. And yes, I will also be carrying
a bronze bust of the Great Mustapha as a souvenir of my historic trip
and a symbol of the eternal friendship between Armenians and Turks.
Upon my return, I will tell every one I know that Turks are our bosom
cousins, that some Armenians were killed by Kurdish and Circassian
bandits in 1915, that some treacherous Armenian revolutionaries
had wanted to tear apart Turkey and eventually rule it with Russian
help, and mention the benefits of Armenia becoming a Turkish vassal
state...discount-price canned imam bayildi, Turkish Delight, tickets
to Galatasarai football matches, and endless supply of lachrymose
Turkish soap operas and inane comedies.
I think I just heard the postman ring the bell.
From: A. Papazian
By Jirair Tutunjian
http://www.armenianlife.com/2012/04/13/sarcastic-reaction-to-turkey-wooing-soft-armenians/
April 13, 2012
As of this morning, I will wait with bated breath for the postman
to deliver the buff envelope with the crescent-and-star insignia
of the Turkish Embassy on the top left corner. In it I expect to
find an invitation for a two-week familiarization trip to Turkey,
featuring a whirlwind visit to Turkish government archives which
would prove there was no genocide, followed by a visit to the Great
Mustapha's mausoleum to place a wreath. I will then traipse through
3,000-year-old fortresses, places of worship and monuments erected
by the Trojans/Lydians/Hittites (all ancestors of the Turks). We
will then make a circle tour of Gozan (Sis), Sanliurfa(Yetesia),
Gaziantep (Aintab) and other towns in Cukurova (Cilicia). We will
then visit Myra, the birthplace of St. Nicholas, the Turkish bishop
who was the original Santa Claus. To wrap up the trip, I expect to
be regaled with shish kebab, raki, chifteh telli and belly dancing
at a cafe overlooking the Bosporus.
I will return from the junket with several kilograms of Turkish
bumph about "Turkey: bridge between East and West", "Turkey: Model
Muslim Democracy", "Turks: the Origin of the Human Race", "Armenian
Terrorists Allies of El-Qaida", "1,000 Turks Who Changed the World." I
would expect that the man from Turkish foreign ministry insist that he
pay the airline for the extra weight. And yes, I will also be carrying
a bronze bust of the Great Mustapha as a souvenir of my historic trip
and a symbol of the eternal friendship between Armenians and Turks.
Upon my return, I will tell every one I know that Turks are our bosom
cousins, that some Armenians were killed by Kurdish and Circassian
bandits in 1915, that some treacherous Armenian revolutionaries
had wanted to tear apart Turkey and eventually rule it with Russian
help, and mention the benefits of Armenia becoming a Turkish vassal
state...discount-price canned imam bayildi, Turkish Delight, tickets
to Galatasarai football matches, and endless supply of lachrymose
Turkish soap operas and inane comedies.
I think I just heard the postman ring the bell.
From: A. Papazian