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Baku Armenian tells the story of exile
by Emil Sanamyan
http://www.reporter.am/go/article/2012-09-28-baku-armenian-tells-the-story-of-exile
Published: Friday September 28, 2012
Anna Astvatsaturian at ICC in The Hague. Courtesy image
Related Articles
Excerpt from "Nowhere: a Story of Exile"
Outrage, as Hungary releases Azeri axe-murderer
Detroit community fundraises for Baku Armenian memorial
"Nowhere, a story of exile" by Anna Astvatsaturian Turcotte edited by
Tatoul Sonentz-Papazian was published this year by HyBooksOnline.com.
In an e-mail interview, the Armenian Reporter discussed this so far
unique work that tells a gripping personal account of a young Anya
whose family - along with more than 200,000 other Armenians - was
displaced from Baku and struggled to adjust in crisis-riven Yerevan
before settling in U.S.
Q: Prior to publishing your diary, have you seen anything similar by
anyone from among Armenians of Baku? Why do you think there is such
shortage of eyewitness material on this subject?
A: I understood from my editor and the publisher that there wasn't
anything similar out there that would paint the plight of Armenians
from Azerbaijan in such a personal and intimate way that it touches a
reader. That is the major reason I wanted to go ahead with the
publication.
>From personal observation, I believe the reason there is such a
shortage of eyewitness material is because survival, along with a
desperate need to adapt to our respective new homes, whether it is
U.S., Russia, Armenia, was the number one priority for the refugees.
The lack of media coverage of the conflict and lack of camaraderie and
support by the Armenians of Armenia are also important reasons. This
important historic information was not sought out and captured, and
the Armenians of Baku, Sumgait and Kirovabad were too traumatized to
revisit it themselves. They are still traumatized. They don't talk
about it at dinner tables. They don't tell their children about it.
But it is always there on their minds because they haven't had an
opportunity to heal.
Q: How would you describe the Baku Armenian experience? And what are
the Armenians of Baku - were they a community, are they still?
A: Although as a child I grew up pretty oblivious to these concerns
prior to 1988, my father, Norik Astvatsaturov, has childhood memories
of violence committed against the Armenians in the Azerbaijani
countryside and on the trains to Armenia and Artsakh as early as
1950s.
There was always a sense of "your place" - Azeris had the managing or
superior jobs, Armenians had the subordinate roles. Baku was tolerant
and international, but yet it wasn't; in a sense that people were
aware of each others' ethnic backgrounds and it dictated a lot of
things in their everyday lives.
That said, I think the few decades before the atrocities of the 1980s
Baku Armenians lived happy, fulfilling lives in a beautiful city by
the sea. There was a place of belonging, a community, weddings, food,
dancing. This peaceful life is what made the events of 1988-1990 so
shocking. People kept repeating that it couldn't be happening here
and now.
I believe Baku Armenians are a unique group of Armenians. We seek
each other out. We know and feel each other. We adapt anywhere we go
and succeed at pretty much anything we set our minds to, because we
grew up living with a constant expectation that you work a little
harder, to prove yourself a little more because in the end, you are
Armenian or a Bakvetsi, or a refugee. We survived and endured so
much, together and alone.
Absolutely, I think that the Baku Armenian community still exists all
over the world wherever we are located, powered by the memories of the
happy past and silently by the unspoken horrors many witnessed.
Q: Following their displacement, most Baku Armenians did not wish to
or were unable to settle in Armenia. Should anyone be blamed for this?
A: I don't think that you can blame anyone. It was a difficult
transition in Armenia's history and one cannot blame one person or one
group of people.
I know from personal experience that Baku Armenians that came to
Armenia had a hard time adjusting, both socially and economically.
Many ended up relocating to Russia hoping for a better future for
their children, whether due to a lack of jobs or intolerance by
Armenia's Armenians. I believe it's a combination of those two
things.
When we fled to Armenia in 1989 most of the friends and family we knew
also came from Baku to Armenia, but some went to Russia. The next
three years in Armenia were so very hard, on all Armenians. I believe
the stress of the economic hardships fueled by the war and the
blockade caused many Armenians in Armenia to throw blame around. The
native Armenians began to associate the changes that came with the war
with Azerbaijan and the collapsing of the Soviet Union with the flood
of refugees. I believe in many ways it was an unfortunate but natural
reaction immediately as it was happening. As I hear of intolerance
toward Baku Armenians currently, however, it makes absolutely no sense
to me.
Baku Armenians were blamed for the dire situation, or were
misunderstood in their love for their home city that no longer existed
for them. The trauma they experienced by the atrocities in Sumgait,
Kirovabad, and Baku, compounded by the trauma of verbal abuse and a
sense of being second rate citizens in their ancestral homeland,
caused many to leave and never look back.
Q: Your book touches on the deeply sensitive subjects for any person:
sexual molestation and also domestic violence against children. Why
did you decide to include those instances in your book? Was it a
difficult decision for you?
A: When I wrote the book, the intended audience was always going to be
my children and their families. The intimacy of the information
shared was never too personal to deter me from sharing our entire
experience. I didn't censor myself, but instead spilled out all of my
memories as record of the events that occurred. I thought it was
important for them to know, fully, the extent of my personal
struggles, and our sacrifices made to establish a happy life for them
in the United States.
Once the decision was made to publish the writings, I painfully
processed these sensitive subjects over and over again in my mind. It
was extremely difficult for me but I went ahead with it.
My family supported me in the decision to keep these instances in the
book to paint the picture of the various abuses suffered at the hands
of the Azeris, even as children, and also to demonstrate how the
experience shaped the refugees themselves and the type of coping
mechanisms some adapted to remain sane.
Q: What are your thoughts of the Armenian-Azerbaijani conflict today?
Will it be over in our lifetime?
A: Although Artsakh today is independent, free and developing steadily
with each year, the conflict, I believe, is at its worst. There is a
whole generation of children in Azerbaijan that is brought up hating
Armenians as a people. The endless propaganda by the Azeri government
shapes their intolerant thoughts.
Even the Azeri friends I grew up with, with whom I recently connected
in preparation for the publication of the book, remember me in one
way, but now view me as an Armenian in a completely warped way. I
find that fascinating. I am their happy childhood memory, and in the
same breath, a deadly enemy.
The rhetoric of continued war is alarming, especially this year. I
believe the recent events shape the way the Artsakh issue will be
resolved - if a sleeping officer is brutally murdered by his classmate
on foreign land and is lauded as a hero and released, how do you think
Azeris will treat Armenian civilians of Artsakh if Artsakh is ever
under Azeri rule?
I do hope for a peaceful resolution of this conflict. I do believe a
resolution (peaceful or not) is possible to occur in our lifetime.
What sacrifices and hurdles it will take to get there, is unfathomable
to me.
About Anna Astvatsaturian Turcotte: Born in 1978 in Baku, she was
displaced her family in 1989 and lived in Armenia for the next two
years. After receiving refugee asylum in the United States over 20
years ago, Anna graduated from the University of North Dakota and the
University of Maine School of Law. Anna lives in Portland, Maine with
her husband and two children.
Connect: Anya discusses her book in an ANCA video.
by Emil Sanamyan
http://www.reporter.am/go/article/2012-09-28-baku-armenian-tells-the-story-of-exile
Published: Friday September 28, 2012
Anna Astvatsaturian at ICC in The Hague. Courtesy image
Related Articles
Excerpt from "Nowhere: a Story of Exile"
Outrage, as Hungary releases Azeri axe-murderer
Detroit community fundraises for Baku Armenian memorial
"Nowhere, a story of exile" by Anna Astvatsaturian Turcotte edited by
Tatoul Sonentz-Papazian was published this year by HyBooksOnline.com.
In an e-mail interview, the Armenian Reporter discussed this so far
unique work that tells a gripping personal account of a young Anya
whose family - along with more than 200,000 other Armenians - was
displaced from Baku and struggled to adjust in crisis-riven Yerevan
before settling in U.S.
Q: Prior to publishing your diary, have you seen anything similar by
anyone from among Armenians of Baku? Why do you think there is such
shortage of eyewitness material on this subject?
A: I understood from my editor and the publisher that there wasn't
anything similar out there that would paint the plight of Armenians
from Azerbaijan in such a personal and intimate way that it touches a
reader. That is the major reason I wanted to go ahead with the
publication.
>From personal observation, I believe the reason there is such a
shortage of eyewitness material is because survival, along with a
desperate need to adapt to our respective new homes, whether it is
U.S., Russia, Armenia, was the number one priority for the refugees.
The lack of media coverage of the conflict and lack of camaraderie and
support by the Armenians of Armenia are also important reasons. This
important historic information was not sought out and captured, and
the Armenians of Baku, Sumgait and Kirovabad were too traumatized to
revisit it themselves. They are still traumatized. They don't talk
about it at dinner tables. They don't tell their children about it.
But it is always there on their minds because they haven't had an
opportunity to heal.
Q: How would you describe the Baku Armenian experience? And what are
the Armenians of Baku - were they a community, are they still?
A: Although as a child I grew up pretty oblivious to these concerns
prior to 1988, my father, Norik Astvatsaturov, has childhood memories
of violence committed against the Armenians in the Azerbaijani
countryside and on the trains to Armenia and Artsakh as early as
1950s.
There was always a sense of "your place" - Azeris had the managing or
superior jobs, Armenians had the subordinate roles. Baku was tolerant
and international, but yet it wasn't; in a sense that people were
aware of each others' ethnic backgrounds and it dictated a lot of
things in their everyday lives.
That said, I think the few decades before the atrocities of the 1980s
Baku Armenians lived happy, fulfilling lives in a beautiful city by
the sea. There was a place of belonging, a community, weddings, food,
dancing. This peaceful life is what made the events of 1988-1990 so
shocking. People kept repeating that it couldn't be happening here
and now.
I believe Baku Armenians are a unique group of Armenians. We seek
each other out. We know and feel each other. We adapt anywhere we go
and succeed at pretty much anything we set our minds to, because we
grew up living with a constant expectation that you work a little
harder, to prove yourself a little more because in the end, you are
Armenian or a Bakvetsi, or a refugee. We survived and endured so
much, together and alone.
Absolutely, I think that the Baku Armenian community still exists all
over the world wherever we are located, powered by the memories of the
happy past and silently by the unspoken horrors many witnessed.
Q: Following their displacement, most Baku Armenians did not wish to
or were unable to settle in Armenia. Should anyone be blamed for this?
A: I don't think that you can blame anyone. It was a difficult
transition in Armenia's history and one cannot blame one person or one
group of people.
I know from personal experience that Baku Armenians that came to
Armenia had a hard time adjusting, both socially and economically.
Many ended up relocating to Russia hoping for a better future for
their children, whether due to a lack of jobs or intolerance by
Armenia's Armenians. I believe it's a combination of those two
things.
When we fled to Armenia in 1989 most of the friends and family we knew
also came from Baku to Armenia, but some went to Russia. The next
three years in Armenia were so very hard, on all Armenians. I believe
the stress of the economic hardships fueled by the war and the
blockade caused many Armenians in Armenia to throw blame around. The
native Armenians began to associate the changes that came with the war
with Azerbaijan and the collapsing of the Soviet Union with the flood
of refugees. I believe in many ways it was an unfortunate but natural
reaction immediately as it was happening. As I hear of intolerance
toward Baku Armenians currently, however, it makes absolutely no sense
to me.
Baku Armenians were blamed for the dire situation, or were
misunderstood in their love for their home city that no longer existed
for them. The trauma they experienced by the atrocities in Sumgait,
Kirovabad, and Baku, compounded by the trauma of verbal abuse and a
sense of being second rate citizens in their ancestral homeland,
caused many to leave and never look back.
Q: Your book touches on the deeply sensitive subjects for any person:
sexual molestation and also domestic violence against children. Why
did you decide to include those instances in your book? Was it a
difficult decision for you?
A: When I wrote the book, the intended audience was always going to be
my children and their families. The intimacy of the information
shared was never too personal to deter me from sharing our entire
experience. I didn't censor myself, but instead spilled out all of my
memories as record of the events that occurred. I thought it was
important for them to know, fully, the extent of my personal
struggles, and our sacrifices made to establish a happy life for them
in the United States.
Once the decision was made to publish the writings, I painfully
processed these sensitive subjects over and over again in my mind. It
was extremely difficult for me but I went ahead with it.
My family supported me in the decision to keep these instances in the
book to paint the picture of the various abuses suffered at the hands
of the Azeris, even as children, and also to demonstrate how the
experience shaped the refugees themselves and the type of coping
mechanisms some adapted to remain sane.
Q: What are your thoughts of the Armenian-Azerbaijani conflict today?
Will it be over in our lifetime?
A: Although Artsakh today is independent, free and developing steadily
with each year, the conflict, I believe, is at its worst. There is a
whole generation of children in Azerbaijan that is brought up hating
Armenians as a people. The endless propaganda by the Azeri government
shapes their intolerant thoughts.
Even the Azeri friends I grew up with, with whom I recently connected
in preparation for the publication of the book, remember me in one
way, but now view me as an Armenian in a completely warped way. I
find that fascinating. I am their happy childhood memory, and in the
same breath, a deadly enemy.
The rhetoric of continued war is alarming, especially this year. I
believe the recent events shape the way the Artsakh issue will be
resolved - if a sleeping officer is brutally murdered by his classmate
on foreign land and is lauded as a hero and released, how do you think
Azeris will treat Armenian civilians of Artsakh if Artsakh is ever
under Azeri rule?
I do hope for a peaceful resolution of this conflict. I do believe a
resolution (peaceful or not) is possible to occur in our lifetime.
What sacrifices and hurdles it will take to get there, is unfathomable
to me.
About Anna Astvatsaturian Turcotte: Born in 1978 in Baku, she was
displaced her family in 1989 and lived in Armenia for the next two
years. After receiving refugee asylum in the United States over 20
years ago, Anna graduated from the University of North Dakota and the
University of Maine School of Law. Anna lives in Portland, Maine with
her husband and two children.
Connect: Anya discusses her book in an ANCA video.